Quick question … what do you think this article is about? Based on the title and the photo, where do you believe most likely I’m going with all of this?
If you guessed the joys and wonders of pregnancy … you’d be wrong! I’m all about getting into the weeds of EXPECTATIONS.
But see what I did there? See how I set the stage with a play on the word “expecting”. Usually, when you use the word “expecting” your natural inclination is to think or believe that someone is pregnant. Am I right?
Well, that’s just it. Expectations tend to be a strong belief that something will or should happen in a particular way. It has that “matter of fact” way to it, where you often don’t give it much thought based on past visible or perceived evidence.
Check out the below excerpt from a past personal journal entry and see what you can glean from it on expectations …
“To whom it may concern:
So, I woke up energized, with purpose, and with a sparkle of joy that just has not been there in quite a while.
Somehow yesterday, a lot of things connected for me, and it was as though the business advice received was the permission I needed to step into my purpose. But also, the permission I needed to personally offload the burden of this world and to take ownership of my GREATER I AM towards my own selfcare, my own mental health. The permission to enjoy me, my ideas, my purpose, and just to not complicate life thereby not complicating me!
And in writing this here and now, I’m realizing that sometimes in life we need to give others the permission to simplify – to take the stress out of a situation. Basically, to be perfectly imperfect. To come as they are, because the true treasure is in that growth journey … the ability to be vulnerable and open about one’s journey as you are on that journey.
Before now, I hadn’t thought of this. Before now, all I could see was what I wanted, and I wanted what I wanted.
It’s so weird, after discovering that I’ve been “sent back to Bethel” (Genesis chapter 35, verse 1 to 3 and 2 Kings chapter 2, verse 2), been sent back to a place of grief, what seemed then like my darkest hour … I am now able to see that I am in this place again because God rescued me from a perceived place of spiritual death, of mental suicide, of the world’s loaded expectations of me. God rescued me from the overbearing grief of loosing a person who meant so much to me that I didn’t even realize how much I relied on the individual.
I knew God. But I did not truly know God until the crutch of reliance was abruptly snatched from under me. However, this time, I think God is showing me and telling me to not get it twisted, He still remains on the throne and that throne should also be in my heart. He should be the one sitting there. He should be my strength. He should be my “superpower”. Therefore, all my expectations and reliance should be on Him.
BREAKTHROUGH!
And here comes the waterworks as I realize that by placing all my expectations of a happy and satisfying life, of provision, security, purpose, and direction in one person … I placed a heavy burden on someone who is in effect trying to figure it all out themself. Their mortality alone could not withstand those expectations whether they were implied, agreed upon, or hoped for.
Oh wow! That’s a lot. I am so sorry for stretching you in a way you were not meant to be stretched …”
Talk truth!
Originally when I wrote this journal entry, I was writing it about someone who I dearly loved and lost. However, one year later, reading it through a different lens, I realized that in a way I was writing it to myself. See I had lost me and would go on to lose me a couple more times, and all the while in expectations.
The thing is … expectations good or bad, high or low can either make you or break you. And where you place these expectations will also be of great importance. Much like a GPS system, if you put in the wrong address you will end up at the wrong destination.
So, choose to uncomplicate you, your relationships, and life by placing your expectations where they belong – in God! Give your loved ones, and people in general the latitude to be authentically them … especially when they hit a rough patch in their personal journey. And remember this also includes you.
TRUST that who God says He is in you is true and constant. ALIGN with His word and thereby with His instructions and principles for running this race called life (remember it’s a marathon and not a 100-meter dash). And importantly, REST in His promises for your life.
Note to self …
When your expectations are in God and not in this world or on an individual (yourself included) there is a freedom to enjoy the process … to enjoy the assignment. Do you understand the assignment?
#trust #align #rest in the Lord …
Kimberly-Joe Osborne is an authentic, purpose driven, and adventurously expectant wife, mother, entrepreneur, and woman of God.
Better known as KJ, she is an outgoing introvert with a heart that beats for family, faith, travel, culture, creativity, and food. After becoming a mother, she realized adulting could sometimes be a “hot mess” and so laundry became her zen. On this road to recovery from trying to be the perfect mom and wife, she is currently writing her first book which speaks to aligning and growing in faith in the midst of routine.
Kimberly-Joe is also the co-founder of CoacHer Legacy, where she dedicates herself to coaching mothers with the objective of redesigning generational legacy God's way. Through CoacHer Legacy, she and her business partner Shelly-Ann Munroe, provide a social safe space for mothers seeking to live a richer life by stepping out into their God given purpose.